Humanity

Pedestals

i’m moving away a little from the shock and awe that caused this post, but it did, I had it.

my LM had a less than stellar response to a very old friend of mine who is related to my ex. I mean, his reaction was twofold, 1. A person who clearly loves me. 2. a very judgemental, class-oriented, conflicted criticizer.

now, these things are both true. but when you have loved someone for so long, you have a tendency to gloss over things, and put them on a pedestal of sorts.

there are so many questions;

*am I okay with this judgement because i’m usually on the winning side? ultimately, this one is a humdinger.

*I’ve always brushed off the criticisms, because of the longevity of the relationship and the humor that also always resides.

*how much do i let LM change my opinions? or am i just seeing the whole world in a new light? with a new mate who is not informed by decades of history?

*was it an incomplete love in the first place? that allowed me to do the glossing? can i absorb the new and complete version and still maintain the love and the pedestal?

Dove in the Window Unwifedmotherexpletive

how the hell do we love each other? we, complex, multiply-layered bodysacks of confusion? c’mon now… HOW?

 

 

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2 thoughts on “Pedestals”

  1. I love this post. I’ve been struggling with similar ideas since 2016—all this loving and thinking is hard. And living, which is what my autocorrect thought I meant by “loving.”

    I’m glad to have found you again! I’m glad you’re writing again!

    – Fern

    1. Oh Fern, this comment got lost and thankfully, found, today. I’m glad you found me again, and I’m so glad for thoughtfilled people, so glad.

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