Humanity

kablooey–pudding brain

Nothing is wrong.  I’m just a major sufferer of summer brain, and thats the truth, ruth. Even when i have the time, i rarely get to writing. and its a real truth also, that i’ve had a lot of time this summer without kids, and i haven’t liked it, and I’ve watched too much tv in an attempt to avoid the self-identity issues that come with the removal of the kids.  And I want them to spend time with their father, i do. in fact, i make it so, all the time. but still. I’ve been feeling stuck in chocolate pudding, which at first few bites is the most delicious thing in the world, and then .  on bite 5 you begin to wonder about that slight metallic taste, though you keep eating…

and then its gone, and you know you would eat more if it were there, and you’ve lost all interest in it, and wonder about your own ability to monitor yourself as an adult. you do. i know you do. i can’t be the only one.

Its August something. And I’ve paid for this year’s bus transportation, and have been just been notified of soccer tryouts. Its winding down, or up, as you see it. Summer, while working from home, and adding in a part time job, makes me feel all stuck. in that pudding, you see? hence, hithertofore, the no-writing.

and now you can see how much you’ve benefited from my absence.

I’m laughing like a crazy head pudding eater.

Black and Yellow Stripes Pudding Brain Unwifedmotherexpletive

 

 

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1 thought on “kablooey–pudding brain”

  1. You’re not alone! Transitioning after a separation, with kids especially, is always bringing up new challenges and moments of “who am I and wtf am I doing”?! 🙂 and then I try again tomorrow! Keep swimming

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