- I survived the November/December overwhelm but something needs to be different when it rolls around next year. There is grief for my father, yes, which can’t be undone. but it is complicated by the loss of the marriage (Yes! Still! I can’t believe it either!) and all the dreams I thought were mine for so long… the holidays are a minefield of negotiations, two kid birthdays and thanksgiving, christmas eve, christmas day, new years eve, new years day and all of the days in between… and full days of childcare/love in amongst it all. negotiations between what is and what I thought life was, negotiations between their father and me, so many of them. Negotiations for myself and my expectations of real life and real love and the real-ity that I am in with the Loveliest man. (he’s still a lovey) I’m fully exhausted.
- There is the world, which is frankly, and still, just TOO MUCH.
- I have made my own laundry detergent. LM did the grating of the soap and it still smells lovely. Fels Naptha, Washing Soda (think baking soda) and Borax. I think that is it. Pretty sure. no link for now because everything i just looked up was corporate or link-laden. i hate that.
- I have more plants than fully makes sense.
- I’m going to forbid my kids any plastic bottles, starting tonight, which, believe it or not, might cause an actual walk-out. it used to be a thing to get drinks after sports. cold ones. now there’s a whole lot of ‘suckit up, kids, we’re almost home’. I’m going to save a lot of money as well. so, bonus.
- and, lastly. i hate gingerbread houses with a passion straight from the divine. molten lava hatred. this one was delivered to a little girl by the LM, who did not know. It was all pre-formed, all of it. all i had to do was frosting it together. has my hatred dissipated, you ask? no. no it has not.
What’s your list like? Tell me.